I hurt my boyfriend and want him back reddit. I DEFENITELY blocked him back and do not want contact.

I hurt my boyfriend and want him back reddit My boyfriend keeps breaking my boundaries Hi, I’m a first time poster so I may not be filling all the info in. I want him back because I know we were good together, and if we had just communicated those final weeks words really affect me and i’ve asked him to be careful with what he says because a lot of the things he’s said to me out of anger will stick with me and make me feel insecure for a very long time. I received an award at work today and really wanted to tell my boyfriend - it’s a big deal in my industry. I told him I need time to think about it, because I really want to but I’m still so hurt and idk how long it will take for me to trust him again. You have to focus on yourself, and then either he'll come back or he won't but either way you'll be a happier person. That makes him feel good, and gets him brownie points. I know I hurt him deeply but I feel he still feels something for me and I want him to just see I can change and just forgive me a little bit. LDR was a deal breaker for me. Think about get back together is completely normal, but after some time, at least for me, it make no sense. He has another partner, who's been dating him for a few more months than i have. . So I miss who I thought she was I guess, not who she actually was/is. If he comes back after some self-reflection, great! But if you look at him, watch him, wait for him, he won't come back. He is also the father to my 3 year old son. TLDR Broke up with my boyfriend back in senior year in The only thing to do right now is to set him free and focus on yourself. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast Massage his back. As soon as he told me about this, I was shocked, started freaking out and apparently yelled at him a It’s really set me back, and he’s blocked me everywhere even though I haven’t tried to reach out to him except to call him out for cheating. I (20F) broke up with my boyfriend (20M) back in October. I really do need him in my life, because other than maybe an occasional hug from my mother, he was the only one i got affection from. My boyfriend stays up and comforts me. I completely understand. You have every right to fight back and beat him. My ex bf kept going behind my back and doing coke with his buddies even though he promised he would stop. To start off, me and my boyfriend broke up a few months ago because things got overwhelming, and I talked to guys very shortly after we broke up and sent pictures to somebody he really hated. i honestly worked on myself and thought about everything that was wrong with me, and why i acted the way i did. Recently my boyfriend and I got into an argument. and god forbid i ever show these insecurities to him, because he TL;DR: My boyfriend is fed up with me because I was very toxic towards him at points in our relationship so now even though I've worked on myself immensely, he doesn't want to help me with intrusive thoughts/reassurance. He keeps telling me he's here for me and that he's not going to be the one to break up with me, but I'd never forgive myself if he ends up hurt. Although my baby daddy and I now have a good relationship and co-parent our son, I have residual defensive instincts. I kept telling him I was fine and I wanted to sleep with him. I say this because someone close to me used to deliberately hurt me and then later used it against me - "all the time I spent comforting you, are you just going to throw that back in my face?" I’m unsure if he’ll come back. I also broke up with my boyfriend, just because I didn’t see things working out long term. I called him and told him I need my sleep, that him calling me at 2 & 3 am is starting to affect my work and if this was any other job, I'd be fired from it. do you think he might want me back? he very deeply wanted a friendship so I’m unsure if he’d ever want me back as a partner. don't take him all the way in by not sitting down fully back on to him. My boyfriend and I recently split, due to some toxic issues in our relationship, as well as his mental health. My parents would take me back in a heartbeat, but the lease is what is keeping from leaving, and the small hope that things will get better. Now, he's Every time my boyfriend(21) and I(19) get into a disagreement, and i end up getting hurt, i always shut him off. I know this guy and he is not happy. i wasn't attracted to him in the slightest but we did the do, he knew i had a Every time my boyfriend(21) and I(19) get into a disagreement, and i end up getting hurt, i always shut him off. I didn't mean he should stop, I honestly just wanted one or two good nights of sleep. ) and It He just looked at me and said, ''you fucking slapped me 6 times, get the fuck out and don't you ever come back in my room ever again''. He is kind, loving and understanding. I think the best form of “revenge” would be to just leave him. He's very happy with me, to the point of being worried the rug is gonna be pulled out from When I got pregnant I was so scared. Ex 1: Went to dinner with some family and friends. I'm not financially stable to be able to move out yet and my mom is really strict, so while I'm with her she wants me to still stay by her house rules I want to but he's stubborn and thinks it's better that I should of just stayed with him and thinks I was acting to just go home. I like your suggestions! My boyfriend loves nice liquor and cocktail-making, but mentioned to me recently he wants to cut back on social drinking, so I think I'm You can't really do better when it comes to tell him that he hurt you. He put his hands on you he is not a man anymore. My ex boyfriend (crazy that I’m actually calling him that) decided to leave me after 6 months. I really do want this person back, he means a lot to me now that i DONT have him. I’m just a friend to him now and I want him to get better and be happy with himself but why couldn’t he do that with me? I asked him if he’d want to come back to it in the future and he just said that it depends on how well he works on himself. It would be unfair on both of you for you to stay, be unhappy and tbh, 'settle'. Your boyfriend lacks empathy, he is self centered and selfish. two nights ago, i went to a staff party and slept over a co-workers house with another co-worker. You don't say anything, you get away from him, as quickly as you can. Maybe it's wise to reassess where you are and where you want to go with this person. Girl from Texas here, you did right. Also so he won't out you. So I didn't put my ego down any further so I walked away. Yes it will hurt him, but you have to accept that you have already hurt him by cheating and you need to act like a grown up and accept responsibility. Until a couple nights ago, I was drinking with my friends and After I said that, I immediately apologised and promised to never, ever, let my anger get the best of me and insult him again. There is always pain around a breakup. just reading your story makes me angry. Being 'good, giving, and game' doesn't involve you feeling pain unless you want to. If that’s the way he’s going to be then you tell him you want your money back on all the things you spent on him or bought for him. You want to get laid. which hurt. But I love him so much and I really want us to work. He did all the stuff for me. He knows he made a huge mistake. TL;DR Me and a couple friends were joking about my boyfriend being boring since he doesn't drink. Your boyfriend is abusive, you don't accidentally slap someone across the face. I hit my boyfriend – am I abusive? The United Nations website defines domestic violence or intimate partner violence as any act that frightens, intimidates, terrorizes, manipulates, hurts, humiliates, blames, injures, or wounds someone else. once i said it, he didn’t say it back but just kissed me. Sitting straight up makes my boyfriend's penis come in contact with my cervix, which hurts like a bitch. My current boyfriend of 8 months is a lovely man. I just. I just don’t know if it’s worth it anymore. He went back to her. Luckily, my boyfriend was there for me through it all, and that made me realize that I should embrace the love we have for each other. However, that is never the case. But now we’re just friends and it’s weird. I know the best thing to do is wait, but i am not a patient person. You my friend are on the door steps of absolute freedom and I really hope it all works out for YOU ;- ). My last boyfriend was highly abusive. At first we were joking a little bit about it and I kept going back into his bed but then he started really making it clear he didn’t want me in there. I want to change for him and I care about him deeply. Domestic abuse can affect anyone of any gender, race, social status, class, or sexuality. She didn’t want to “hurt my feelings”. i haven't slept with my boyfriend, i am nowhere near ready. He will need constant reassurance until the trust repairs. i tried talking to him to play mc with me to Two days ago I cheated on my boyfriend, we've been together for 2 years. I know that giving your partner the silent treatment is wrong, and it is a form of emotional manipulation, but i can’t help but do it every time i get hurt. Obviously my boyfriend was insecure, hurt, angry, and reacting just from his previous relationship that burned him quite a bit, but when the person on the receiving end of that statement doesn't know the specifics or what your previous relationship is like, all you sound like is a selfish, cynical jerk who isn't concerned about making the Again, I didn’t want to hurt you and hope you understood my viewpoint even if you disagree with it. Basically, I grew up in an abusive household, and I have been in an abusive relationship in the past, so now I think I'm overly sensitive to jokes at my expense. My bf expressed to me that he still cares for his ex deeply and wishes them wl but does not have any interest in a relationship with them again. What can I do to make him feel better? I would really appreciate any insight. Advice? we’ve been seeing each other for almost 4 months and for reasons i won’t get into, it is complicated. She didn’t want to “settle down”, tbh, in hindsight, I was just happy to be with her. He did something behind my back that we planned to do together (think something silly- like watch a TV series we were watching together without me/going to a restaurant we planned to try together without me/ etc. I miss my friend but she hurt me more than anyone ever has and I don't know if there is a way to come back from that. The issue for me stems from the fact that his ex is still trying to get my boyfriend back together again. I playfight with my boyfriend too and yeah I've gotten hurt, but it was small stuff, like his leg hit my shin in our scuffle lol. Looking back, it was very unhealthy. This bs that you don't want to tell him so that don't hurt him is a lie. As someone who spent months scrolling through this forum searching for positive reconciliation stories, subscribed to Matthew Hussey's mailing list, even started to believe the tarot readings on my TikTok fyp telling me that my ex was just 'on the wrong path', believe me when I say that I couldn't have wanted him back more. My boyfriend is very sarcastic, and I love that about him, but sometimes when he's teasing me I get reminded of the really cruel things that people close to me have said in the past. I know she checked out long before we actually “broke up” which she just kind of decided to go out with someone else without even formally telling me we were broken up, because she was spineless about it. For me, what he's doing is tolerable in consideration of all the stress I placed on him. He is such a great guy and he was so wonderful to me but I just felt that something was missing. That being said, in my experience the trust never quite fully heals. He once triggered me with something he said that he didn't realize had trauma attached to it. it took 2 years of it, to get out, and she would constantly tell me that she would stop. It's unavoidable. Also, I didn’t want to sit with him if he didn’t want me to. Next time, just let me know (whatever)". Now, he's this is a throwaway account because he knows and looks at my actual reddit this all happened very recently, long story short, my [19f] (now ex? idk) boyfriend [24m] and i had been together for two years. TL;DR boyfriend accidentally hurt my back badly. I just thought to myself: screw you. even so, he hangs out with his partner every other day, and they I called him and told him I need my sleep, that him calling me at 2 & 3 am is starting to affect my work and if this was any other job, I'd be fired from it. You are not telling him to keep a hope for you to go back and so he won't be disgusted by you. He's a big boy- he'll get over it. Despite his anger from the disagreement we had, he knew he screwed up. Im unsure if I want him back. I told him to fk off basically. i had an SO that hit [m]e. If it was in person I don’t know if he would have been able to say it, but it was over the phone. I caught my ex cheating on me and I tried my hardest to build back but it always niggled away at me even 2 years on. Chances are he isn't, but he seems to really love comforting you and kissing it better. I don't really know what I feel other than hurt tbh. it’s been on the tip of my tongue to say as naturally as breathing for the last couple months so i knew if i didn’t want it to be a shock i’d have to plan a little and get it out there. It was the “okay, good” comment that hurt my feelings and the fact that he was still mad about a small disagreement enough avoid me, Girl he’s trying to trap your ass get tf out of there. I am struggling to forgive him. i totally understand. I never thought he would have to see me like that. 8 Try To Work Out Why You Hurt Them Showing your partner that you're working on bettering My then-boyfriend’s first reaction when he saw me — rather than comforting me because I’d just visited my grandpa for the last time — was to get angry that I didn’t get him a burrito I started school a bit early so I did graduate with him he's just born a bit earlier than me. You understand how telling him you want to give him back some of his things would hurt him right? You in your mind are thinking of trying to get together with him and using his things as an excuse to see him, but telling someone you have recently broken up with that you want to give them their things back is like saying "Yes, our relationship . I was crying for 2 hours straight, my wrist still hurts. but some part of me wishes he’d reach out. Archived post. I hope he goes out in the world and finds the most beautiful girl who will love him. I had messaged him at 2:30pm about the flights we were looking at for our holiday and received no reply, so thought it best to call him after work to let him know about the award. He choose to stay with me and continue loving me despite how badly I acted. this has caused a majority of issues now that we’re back together, and now he doesn’t trust me because I was untruthful when we started talking again and because of the fact I called a No worries, I am only reading this now also. I dont even want him to text back, i just want to say "what you said to me was horrible, and i should have called out your lies. from what he's told me, he's fine with that. I asked him if we could resolve these issues together because I believed they were fixable on my end, but he didn’t believe me, nor did he want to give me another chance at the time. I only want the pain to go away :( Secondly, I don’t think you should enact revenge and cheat on him or hurt him, I know you want him to feel pain but doing anything unfaithful will only tarnish your reputation. I just want him to understand that what he did hurt my feelings, him to apologize, and us to move on. cook him a nice meal, give him an Old Fashioned, and call it a day. I'm sure it really hurt him that you don't understand what you did wrong either. The last time he If you'd flirt in front of him you damn sure do when he's not there. I also was very honest with my boyfriend because I knew I would push him away and try to make him want to break up with me so it could just be over with. Do you see my point? A single tear drops down your cheek" If he gets defensive/shows that he doesn't care go back to saying, "Your lack of concern for my He invalidates my feelings during arguments, which I try to start out as an open conversation about what I need. I would see other We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I promise you you’re just going to push him away if you don’t let him do his own thing. To put in his exact words, “our relationship was great and happy, but not healthy and I think a break is what we needed”. We got into an argument about some issues he had with me. S o my solution is to break up I want to make things up to my boyfriend because I'm scared of losing him. At first we were just friend but then we started flirting, and after about a year of us flirting he finally said he liked me and wanted to take me out on a date. If a guy tried to hit me i would lay into him aswell and it What it comes down to is that he really regrets his decision and that it was rash of him to break up with me because he is in a bad mental space and that he wants me back. I don’t know how to cope. Move on focus on yourself love is not forced so don’t force it if you still want him back by the time they split up then reach out to him but that guy will only be thinking about his current girl if you get back with him right away so best thing is to move on and within a year from now if he’s single hit him up but by then you will know I’m beyond depressed, missing my boyfriend and best friend. He held me, kissed me, apologized profusely, and we calmed down together. And you are telling him about your trash behavior because I feel so horrible because even though it hurt my feelings, he didn’t know he was hurting my feelings and he would never intentionally do so. Yeah I’m not really into play fighting it’s usually him coming for me and me telling him to get off lol . He's a super lovely, loyal, honest man with a pure soul. And i am very hurt and regretful for what i did. And give him space to come to terms with whatever it was you said. You need to tell him to know what kind of friend he has. I just know I want him back, but he said what he said. He’s now with her again, they quickly reunited. I have a friend who insults and demeans her boyfriend in front of others for cheap laughs on a regular basis - it gets old really fast and leads everyone involved to wonder what the fuck is wrong with your relationship. Person with empathy would be sorry and never do stuff which causes hurt again. He told me he didn’t want me to sleep in his bed and I needed to sleep in my own. For example, tonight he did something that kind of hurt my feelings. Let him come to you when he has time to hang out. That when he told, the hurt he was feeling hasn't been gone, that day he shared to his friends how much it took a toll in him my behavior was (his shitty roommate too), and he was at his limit, he even cried fo them, he told me when he got home he was planning on staying on sleeping over. he wanted me home, i didn’t realize the emotional pain i was putting him through, i was being selfish and too focused on my own problems. Dont go back if he has been violent before he could be again. TL;DR my boyfriend doesn’t kiss me how he used to, says I should get over it. it’s extremely damaging to my self esteem and security in this relationship. I said was that I was really sad bc my ex asked me to come visit and I said no but didn't tell him why. You don’t own him money anything he’s given you are gifts not loans. i always struggled struggled to talk to him about the rap3, i felt The only thing holding me back right now is our living status since we live together and have a lease. We used to fight a lot but for the past couple of months we've been pretty solid. And that telling him why would mean hurting him a lot. And if this continues then I’m just going to end up resenting him and I don’t want to raise a family with a man who considers his only job to It will be sad for him but sometimes things just don't work out. when i reflected on everythjng i did, i was truly able to I broke up with my boyfriend of a year a few weeks ago. Turned out he had a new phone (Spanish number) and he started texting me again for attention I think, while I was on a date with another guy. i feel sorry for your bf, and have absolutely no sympathy for you. Your Reddit posts are all about him, and all of them very immature ("i don't want my boyfriend on Instagram", "I don't want my bf going to the gym alone"). I told him I’m so hurt and sad and lonely. I feel so bad for yelling at him all the time for comparing me without even knowing. :( Edit: I suppose I shouldn’t offer my advice in this particular scenario since I’ve never formally been in relationship. I DEFENITELY blocked him back and do not want contact. I wish I could take it back. He was aware of this, but didn't connect the dots. Well first, him laughing is literally the point of my post. He emailed me saying it was the biggest mistake of his life. But I’ve fortunately stopped crying. I hate myself, I can’t believe I wasted 2 years of his in high school. Tbh right after my ex break up with me I kept the "maybe we can reconnect in the future" thought, but a previous ex started to talk to me again trying to get another chance, I remember back in 2016 when this guy broke up with me and all I was It seems like you have the perfect breakup scenario. I've never seen him so scared and sad. I love him more than anyone else. He can't trust you at all. This is a severely long rant. He was my first love. My boyfriend isn't perfect, nor am I. My ex was something similar. If I were him I would assume you cheated on me at that point, you'd have lost all benefit of the doubt but it wouldn't matter either way, you'd be out. "Your lack of concern for my feelings is not a quality I want for my boyfriend. So he had a vasectomy to ease my mind and I hurt him. You shouldn’t feel guilty, is it better to be with him/her and don’t act as before, without any affection and stuff and they will eventually get hurt at the end, if you don’t want them to get hurt it’s better to end the relationship, or is it better to end it, say the things how they are, they will accept it better than not giving them My boyfriend's feelings do get hurt when I run late to things, but its only a problem on the rare occasions that something goes wrong and I'm an hour late to meeting or don't call back for long periods of time. But remember that you did this for the right reasons. Boyfriend now thinks I find him too boring and is feeling very insecure about it. It’s been 2 days no contact and the heart ache is still there. I don't know what to do, I dont want to loose him because he's actually really great and he's one of my best friends and I don't want to hurt him but I don't feel like I want to date him. Paul (28M) and I (22F) met online and started dating very shortly Since then I've been contacting him only if he wrote anything to me and giving him the space he wants and only positive vibes. I don't even remember half the things I said, I was a zombie running on fumes and caffeine. <Say examples of him not caring about your feelings and him bitching afterwards to make the topic about him>. And although I miss him terribly, more than I ever thought I would, the fact that I had to hurt him hurts me so much more. I know him and I need to grow being apart because we’ve been together since we were teenagers. We were speaking on the phone and I said "tonight, when you blah blah blah, it kind of hurt my feelings. I’ll be raising one more human by myself, all alone. Take some time to reflect on why you feel neglected then talk to him about it. You can come back from a breach of trust in a relationship, but you have to be willing to put in the work. You don't hurt him by not cheating on him. I didn't want our child to be like me and my freakouts were really bad during the second pregnancy. BE genuine. Guys can get off without having their The Situation: Last night I accidentally hurt my BF's feelings when I told him I was experiencing a lot of guilt and sadness and anxiety over the breakup. I have stood by my promise. Last week i had my third nightmare about it and it really fucked me up for the day, i spent all day in bed and crying and i really wanted to talk to someone about it but i didn't want to talk to him because he apologized and i don't think he can help anymore, but i also don't want to talk to my friends because i think if i tell them exactly Among other stuff that was a little worse than that but hurt too much to type. She's quite possibly the worst thing that ever happened to me. My boyfriend cried. I broke up with him, effectively breaking my own heart. My boyfriend and I were in a really good place. I didn't know I had them until yesterday. 20 years later, it was 1000% the right decision. I accepted all of those horrible comments without saying anything, and now i regret it. be more careful in the future. If this isn't what you want, you go after your own life. im glad you realize that it was wrong to do, but i hope he presses charges so that you truly learn your lesson. Thank you. I tried to tell him that I slapped him ONLY because I was being hurt by him but he didn't listen. but the thing is, they have slept together. I know I’m worth so much more and I don’t want him back, it’s just the way he’s treated me when by his own admission I did nothing wrong and was great in every way No worries, I am only reading this now also. How caan we balance responsibilities so I don't feel like I'm taking on the brunt of his mistake? EDIT: I hurt my back badly in the same spot 10 years ago and it was a 2 year recovery till I could get back to sports. It hurts me to see him like that and to know he's worrying about me all the time. my ex boyfriend somewhat supported this but was obviously upset. I blocked him back. Let's call my boyfriend Paul. I would love to show him that I can be If you do manage to get back with him, prepare yourself for the insecurities that will follow. Hi! Wanna start off my saying my boyfriend is great and I know in my heart he has no ill intentions, but he makes jokes about me that hurt my feelings and it’s like I keep having to tell him what’s appropriate to joke about and what isn’t. I went to my grandmothers in the country for almost all of April and May. Then when he deflects everything I feel, it unfortunately escalates the talk into a fight because I'm feeling like he's not listening at all and just immediately jumps to defensive/sarcastic mode where he tells me why my feelings are wrong. i hate my body and i just don't feel ready at all. I don’t take back anyone who hurt me that deeply. If you want him to feel you’re genuine. His feelings will be hurt. And things will slowly get better. My birthday actually happened like 2 weeks after I moved here and he was one of the only people I knew (he took me out to a nice place for birthday drinks, which was sweet of him). It was so annoying and I saw that he unblocked me. He is unable/doesn't want to understand you. You have the 2nd chance all of us have been hoping for but you realize how much he made you suffer and you really don't want him back. and it’s so occasional that he’ll do something like this (I know it’s not an excuse) but usually we’ll get over it and I’ll forget about it because I’m thinking he’s just silly he doesn’t get what he’s doing idk but this time he went too far so I’m really feeling For context, my boyfriend has had it rough most of his life and has been through some traumatic experiences and the only reason he was doing these drugs was to help ease/numb his pain. I met him first year in college and we got really close, I would consider him one of my best friends. You’re putting yourself on the back burner in your relationship by telling him it’s you and he doesn’t need It's really good advices. This is the first emotion he has shown in the 4 years we have been together. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year now, and he's really great. ucdwqh sglz bjxi gsvzmk njm yfibhj ragavfj tfqd dcac ttjsn rujgm nzxf lmq fluli fdhtordw